Big News: Coppers, Diplomatic Police, and Cabbies at Ecuadorian Embassy, All for Assange

 

 

Police surround the Ecuadorian embassy in London, preparing, or at least trying, to arrest Julian Assange on violation of his bail, as he has not checked in with the court in over a month. But of course if he left the embassy to check in, he’d be nabbed and extradited to Sweden to deal with accusations of rape, and possibly then extradited to the U.S. where he’d be up against far more serious charge–like life and death charges–of espionage over WikiLeaks.

Protestors and citizen journalists began reporting at around 11pm UK time, and several news feeds including OccupyNewsNetwork have been broadcasting live. There is police van parked in front of a side door. About a dozen police officers went into the building at 9:15am UK time. Earlier, men in suits who identified themselves as diplomatic police entered.

At few minutes earlier, around 9am UK time, some wags began calling taxis to the embassy using Assange’s name. The first driver was let in, and left disappointed. More cabs arrived, despite the livestream chatters explaining that the cabbies were part of the 99% and shouldn’t be pranked. Eventually a gray cab Mercedes pulled up with this sign in the window.

No one came out to take the ride to Heathrow.

What if Assange gained a bunch of weight, grew a beard and dyed it brown, and left on a fake passport during the Olympics!?

“Julian Assange, Superstar” aka “WikiLeaks, The Musical”

If Hollywood has its way and the check clears, Julian Assange, the international man of mystery currently enjoying Ecuadorian hospitality whilst planning his birthday party inside that country’s embassy, will be the subject of a biopic fraught with cyber espionage and condomless sex. According to the Wall Street Journal, HBO Films, DreamWorks Studios, Universal Pictures and Annapurna Pictures are all frothing and panting to bring Assange’s story to a megaplex or cable box near you.

There are a lot of loose ends though–not the least of which being who would play the pale and lanky leader of WikiLeaks; Tim Robbins, even though he’s a bit older than Assange, possesses plenty of boyish charm and height–dangling plots points like Bradley Manning who is in prison and on trial; what happens with the Syrians cables; Assange’s potential extradition to Sweden…

Here’s a solution: A musical! As Spiderman Turn Off the Dark proves, stage plays are constantly evolving. As the Assange/WikiLeaks story unfolds, the libretto could be adjusted; and it’s a sure Tony Award winner, and once things are resolved in real life, the film would be ready to go. Along with Assange’s all singing, all dancing  grandstanding and honeypot sampling, Bradley Manning’s character would be onstage throughout as the tragic counterpoint and moral compass, first at a computer screen, then behind bars, always present, a contrast to Assange’s hubris.

Plus there would have to be a Greek chorus of Anonymous in EFG masks performing catchy numbers like “Low Orbit Ion Cannon,”  and “DDoS Us All” while Loooong Cat and Nyan Cat dance. It’s all a hummable, teachable-moment multi-media extravaganza! And Neil Patrick Harris would be SUPER in the starring role! Or maybe Zac Efron. Think Clay Aiken for the touring company.

If any Broadway producers are interested, you know where to find me…

The EFG Greek/geek chorus can get serious at times, while Manning’s character is the musical’s moral compass.

Message from Julian Assange?

I think Julian Assange’s penalty for four counts of  whatever the Swedes are calling it now should be a stint as global EFG poster boy for safe sex:


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