Or rather, did you have sex with Rick Perry? For free or for compensation?  Did you play with Perry’s pecker in the hopes that one day he’d make it big and you’d hit the jackpot? Hope you saved some spooge! If so, your poignant recollection of Rick’s randiness is now worth $ 1 million.

Maybe at the time you weren’t thinking of doing it for the money.  Maybe you like man-tan and pancake hair. But now that you’ve done the deed–and can prove it–Larry Flynt will pay you up to $1 million for your tale of Texan titillation. Granted tax will come out of that, but think of it as economic stimulus for your past stimulation. You could just ask Larry Flynt to donate the money to various charities, maybe ones in Texas–say for LGBT youth, the homeless and of course death penalty appeals.

This isn’t Flynt’s first time stirring the kettle of sexual incrimination. And he isn’t flying solo in his quest to discover Perry’s peripheral pokings. Last month Ron Paul  ran an ad looking for anyone who may have rendez-voused with Rick.

One thing is clear: There’s liquid gold in Texan teabagging.

photo: screen shot, Written on the Wind (Douglas Sirk, dir. 1956)

Bowing to the pressure of special interest groups, Rick Perry signed National Organization for Marriage’s anti-marriage pledge, joining fellow GOP hopefuls Michele Bachmann and Mitt Romney in their promise to increase the size of government by creating

a presidential commission on religious liberty;

spending taxpayer dollars by sending a

a Constitutional amendment defining marriage as the union of one man and one woman to the states for ratification;

and by defending the Defense of Marriage Act in court. Additional government spending will be required to

“advance legislation to return to the people of the District of Columbia their vote on marriage.”

How un-Republican. It is horrifying that the GOP candidates for president are groveling for the votes of extremists and vowing to appoint judges that will legislate from the bench. I am shocked, absolutely shocked!

Academy Award winning screenwriter Dustin Lance Black’s play 8 covering the Proposition 8 hearings and starring Morgan Freeman, Anthony Edwards, Cheyenne Jackson, Christine Lahti, Rob Reiner, Yeardley Smith and Marisa Tomei hits Broadway on September 19th in a one-time staged reading at the Eugene O’Neil Theater to benefit the American Foundation for Equal Rights. Tickets start at $500.

AFER was formed specifically to fund the legal challenge against Proposition 8. A previous fundraiser, featuring a full length concert with Elton John was held earlier this year in Los Angeles.

8 is based on the California Supreme Court trial transcripts, and Milk screenwriter Black, who spent six months writing the play, told the New York Times:

I mined the best arguments on both sides, trying to capture everything on their side that was a winning point and anything on our side that was a winning point.

Luckily Black didn’t have to deal with these kind of arguments found on Facebook.

Wow, what’s next, blaming gays for hurricanes? Oh wait the heterosexual Rick Perry’s buddy/partner in Jesuspalooza, James Hagee has already done that.

8 will also be staged at Carnegie Mellon University, Northwest, and the University of Michigan.

[Thanks, Pam Spaulding for FB tip; h/t OnTopMagazine]

photo: creative commons, Mary McTavish

Governor Rick Perry’s presidential campaign office did not respond to repeated requests regarding his ownership of stock in Movie Gallery, a video rental company that was boycotted by American Family Association for the pornographic and violent films it sold and rented. Some of the titles included Teens with Tits Vol. 1, Teen Power Vol. 4, Teens Never Say No, Big Tit Brotha Lovers 6, Bisexual Barebacking Vol. 1 which from its title and cover appears to advocate gay and straight naked fornication and sodomy. Big Tit Brotha Lovers 6 offers:

How liberal of Rick Perry to support these things!

American Family Association, Perry’s partner in the recent Jesuspalooza fundamentalist rally in Houston, The Response, crusaded for years against Movie Gallery, urging boycotts beginning in 2000 and rejoicing in the chain’s closure.

When questioned on August 17, 2011 about AFA’s awareness of (family values campaigner, the heterosexual) Rick Perry’s stock in Movie Gallery, on Cindy Roberts in the AFA press office gasped,

Why, I had no idea!

Randy Sharp, AFA’s point person for the Movie Gallery boycott did not return our call by press time.

Rick Perry’s financial records–before he put all his publicly traded stock in a blind trust (established in 1996), making them unavailable to public scrutiny–show he invested between $5,000 to $10,000 in Movie Gallery, according to a 2006 article on Texas blog Burnt Orange, which cites Perry’s personal financial statement for 1995, the last year available.

And in June 2003 Perry signed tort reform law which Burnt Orange says benefited Movie Gallery.

Perry said the bill would “remov[e] the incentive for trial lawyers to file frivolous lawsuits.” Continuing Perry said, “we will save thousands of jobs, generate millions in new revenue to the state”

Until it went out of business in 2010, Movie Gallery , the nation’s second largest video chain, was the largest distributor of pornography in America and the only major retail chain to sell pornography in its flagship stores. The margin of profit on porn allowed the chain to undercut rental prices on mainstream videos, forcing mom-and-pops out of business. In 2003, Movie Gallery faced a $75 million federal lawsuit from an employee claiming racial discrimination. The suit also claimed Movie Gallery illegally distributed pornography across state lines. Additionally two suits

were filed on behalf of smaller competing video stores, which allege that Movie Gallery’s profits from the illegal distribution of porn across state lines allow it to lowball the prices of nonporn movies. One of the other lawsuits is a harassment action filed by former employees who say the porn created a hostile working environment.

Thomas Johnson Jr., a Movie Gallery senior vice president, said the suits were

frivolous

Sound familiar?