Late Night: Let’s Play Movie Producer–The John McAfee Story

 

John McAfee, the anti-computer virus pioneer who went all Colonel Kurtz/rave gangsta in the jungles of Belize experimenting with extreme drugs, boinking young girls, and allegedly murdering his neighbor, was captured in Guatemala because some noob journo with an iPhone forgot to scrub the geo-data before uploading the photo. Oops. (Or maybe it was a vast conspiracy!)

Anyway, now that he’s in jail, McAfee–who is prolific blogger and blames his arrest on officials in Belize who have it in for him (nothing to do with drug experiments and boinking young girls, let alone allegedly murdering his neighbor since according to McAfee that was a set-up, or something)–has proved he really must be innocent. Because he sold the TV and film rights to his story to a production company, and issued this statement:

My most heartfelt thank you goes to Impact Future Media and Cartoon Monkey Studio. Their dedication to the truth is very uncommon in the world we live in today. I am now, and will always be, grateful to their organizations.

So, who would you cast as McAfee? Robert Downey, Jr.? Sean Penn? Christian Bale? (McAfee is kind of like American Psycho’s Patrick Bates after too long at Burning Man!). Matthew McConaughey? Gerard Butler? Josh Brolin? Maybe go age-appropriate with John Malkovich or Sam Butler?

Title ideas?

Goin’ Viral
Belize Me
Jungle Innocence
Nerdfinger
Thirty Day Free Trial: The John McAfee Story
Running in the Background


 

FBI WARNS: Tattoo Shops To Be on Alert for Customers Paying Cash

Paying cash for that long-awaited tattoo of  Derpy Hooves or Rainbow Dash holding a PBR could get you questioned by the FBI, especially if you and your Bronies all go for My Little Ponies inked  on your inner calves.

Publicintelligence.com has compiled a collection of Communities Against Terrorism fliers created by the FBI and Bureau of Justice Assistance and

distributed to local businesses in a variety of industries to promote suspicious activity reporting. The flyers are not released publicly, though several have been published in the past by news media and various law enforcement agencies around the country.

The fliers all warn against people who

Insist on paying with cash or uses credit card(s) in different name(s)

[sic] Damn, that phrase’s grammar is fail!  And it’s on several of their fliers! Anyway…

The flier entitled “Potential Indicators of Terrorist Activities Related to Tattoo Shops” presents some real issues for tattoo shop owners (who actually prefer cash), since most of the indicators of a “terrorist” actually match demographic subsets of the larger Hipster Community:

•    Significantly alters appearance from visit to visit (shaving beard,
changing hair color, style of dress, etc) [Hipster]
•    Have missing hand/fingers, chemical burns, strange odors or bright colored stains on clothing [Hipster/artist/Burning Man attendee/trustafarian on an experimental psychotropic binge]
•   Make suspicious comments regarding anti-US, radical theology, vague or cryptic warnings that suggest or appear to endorse the use of violence in support of a cause. [Hipster who has read too much poli sci and Robert Anton Wilson, or falls asleep listening to Coast to Coast/trustafarian on an experimental psychotropic binge]

The tattoo shop flier also alerts staff to be wary of groups who

Make repeated returns with multiple individuals requesting identical tattoos.

You know, like rock bands and their girlfriends, frat boys. And Bronies.

(The FBI already considers the Jugalos, followers of the band Insane Clown Posse to be a gang, though the pierced, tattooed and heavy made up clan of thousands who gather annually at Hogrock Campgrounds in Cave-in-Rock, Illinois maintain:

Juggalos are NOT a gang [W]e are family whoop whoop.

I think the FBI sending a a team to infiltrate Gathering of the Juggalos is the premise for a really bad movie. But think of the soundtrack possibilities!)

Despite this hysterical headline:

FBI Says Paying for Your Morning Coffee with Cash a Potential Terrorist activity, Urges Coffee Shop Owners to Report Cash-Paying Customers to Authorities

there is nothing in the CAT program about using cash at Intelligentsia (or heavens forfend if you’re in the ‘burbs, at a Starbies), though proprietors of “internet cafes” (do those even exist anymore with so many places WiFi-ed?) should be wary of those who

•    Are overly concerned about privacy, attempts to shield the screen from view of others
•    Always pay cash or use credit card(s) in different name(s)
•    Apparently use tradecraft: lookout, blocker or someone to distract employees
•    Act nervous or suspicious behavior inconsistent with activities
•    Are observed switching SIM cards in cell phone or use of multiple cell phones
•    Travel illogical distance to use Internet Café
Activities on Computer indicate:
•    Evidence of a residential based internet provider (signs on to Comcast, AOL, etc.)
•    Use of anonymizers, portals, or other means to shield IP address
•    Suspicious or coded writings, use of code word sheets, cryptic ledgers, etc.
•    Encryption or use of software to hide encrypted data in digital photos, etc.
•    Suspicious communications using VOIP or communicating through a PC game

Though really any combination of those could indicate a screenwriter, gamer, cheating spouse, or  the blogger whose home computer crashed…

[H/T: Natural News]

[Photo and tattoo artwork: Broken Art Tattoo in Silver Lake, CA;  via creative commons]

Is Department of Homeland Security Cracking Down on Art?

 

I just learned something new today, that the Department of Homeland Security issues permits for the City of Santa Ana, CA to host events, according to a letter sent by Vicky Baxter, Executive Director of Downtown Incorporated of Santa Ana, to the Cacophony Society, who are providing installations and amusement during the Art Walk at Grand Central Santa Ana, the city’s large arts complex. The February 4th Art Walk celebrates the premier of Into the Zone: The History of the Cacophony Society, which will be our subject on Movie Night, February 13.

The Cacophony Society, with lodges in thirty-six U.S. cities and nine countries around the world and whose motto is

You may already be a member

is a group of post-Dada, post-modern, chaos and art creating, urban, urbane Erisians. These disciples of Dischordianism and neo-Anerisia–whose members were instrumental in organizing Burning Man–have long staged events like the Art of Bleeding (faux educational programs in health and safety); mock protests over ludicrous causes; the placing of cement filled teddy bears in public places; painting chalk outlines of bodies on sidewalks; and other

experiences beyond the mainstream.

The Cacophony Society’s antics inspired Project Mayhem in  Chuck Palahniuk’s Fight Club and organized the earliest  flashmobs. And they are  known to be savvy media hoaxsters/culture jammers. But really, would anyone stage this kind of a prank falsely claiming to be from a city official which cited (teh horrors) the Department of Homeland Security? According to a post by Reverend Al Ridenour of Cacophony Los Angeles (who, full disclosure, I have known for years), Cacophony received a letter from Vicky Baxter, Executive Director of Downtown Incorporated of Santa Ana stating:

Today I received a call from Mike McCoy, Homeland Security who issues permits for events from the City, with concerns about the February Art Walk and the association with the Cacophony Society. He spent some time looking at the website and is concerned about what will be presented to the public because the City of Santa Ana is co-sponsor of the First Saturday Art Walks. He is asking for a detailed description of what will be presented to avoid any issues with public complaints or controversy. I did not anticipate this but he is right. We do co-host the First Saturday Art Walks with the City.

Please send me the details of what is planned so we can inform Mike.

I called Mike McCoy, who is based out of DHS’s Sacramento office where he works in Logistics Management as a pay grade GS15 level employee, and left a message. (BTW, the DHS doesn’t list their local numbers; you have to call the DC headquarters and get patched through. Scary!). Mike McCoy didn’t call me back.

I wanted to know the how and why of DHS issuing permits for Santa Ana’s events. Do those permits cost money? What types of events must must be permitted? What happens if Santa Ana holds an event without a DHS permit? And does this apply to every city in the USA? Is DHS present at the Downtown LA Art Walks? And what exactly about the Cacophony Society’s website is so darned disturbing? What are his concerns about the Cacophony Society? For how many art events throughout the country has the DHS requested additional information, and what were those shows? Are Cacophony members going to fall under surveillance now, and for what exactly?

Cacophony LA responded to McCoy with the following letter:

We understand the Department’s domain over public complaints and controversy in the arts as well as the precedent setting crowd control issues and threat of civil disturbance raised by the April 3, 2004 GCAC’s exhibition of art by Thomas Kinkade “Painter of Light.” In cooperation with your request for further information, we are providing the attached list of public art and performance scheduled as part of our opening.

ART CARS

These are playfully customized cars typically decorated both with thrift store finds, and other colorful detritus, generally free of sharp edges or objectionable content. … It should be pointed out that the visual and sculptural references in Reverend Linville’s “Ass Car,” are exclusively confined to parts of canine anatomy freely displayed throughout our country wherever dogs are found. …

DO IT YOURSELF PROTEST AREA

One of the iconic activities engaged in by the Cacophony Society is mock protests over ludicrous causes. Honoring this tradition and as a satiric nod toward the controversial and ultimately dangerous nature of public discourse, we provide a soapbox, poster board, and markers to Society Members as well as enthusiastic passersby.   These activities and limited use of bullhorns will be conducted in accordance with our understanding of issues of pubic nuisance and noise abatement and/or guidelines issues at DHS discretion.

COMEDY & MAGIC

Comedian-magician Bieno Svengali as well as comedian Eric Cash will perform.  Exact content of their sets is not confirmed at this time, though Cash is expected to preside over a mock raffle “giveaway” of an Afghani war orphan.

And to show there are no hard feelings, Cacophony added this bonus attraction:

HOMELAND SECURITY HOSPITALITY STATION

In the spirit of free discourse and rapprochement, The Cacophony Society will dedicate a table to the display of introductory literature on the CS as well as whatever literature or materials DHS would care to provide.  A live representative will be available for discussion. Coffee and donuts provided.

Oh I have one last question for Mr. McCoy from the Department of Homeland Security: Am I on a list now for writing about this?

image #2 Tarot card from the Rider-Waite tarot deck, drawn by Pamela Coleman-Smith, 1909; public domain


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