Tripp Palin Would Make Perfect Chick-fil-A Spokesperson. And There’s a Same-Sex Kiss-In. Oh Heck, Make a Chicken Fritter Sammie at Home

Sarah Palin’s only grandson–the spawn of failing reality television arriviste Bristol Palin and fellow Wasillabilly fame-scrambler Levi Johnston–three-and-a half year old Tripp Palin called his Aunt Willow a word beginning with F  (either a usually pejorative term for gay men, from the English schoolboy slang for a younger boy who does errands for older students; or the Anglo-Saxon verb for copulation. A production exec who claims he was in the room and watching the video feed pre-bleep claims the latter). Tripp also says

I hate you.

A lot.

With his pedigree and language skills, the adorable, yet poorly disciplined tot would be the perfect replacement for the Muppets who have stepped away from their gig as Chick-fil-A spokespmodels in light of the corporate fowl fryer’s ‘tude. CEO Dan Cathy said:

But as an organization we can operate on biblical principles. So that is what we claim to be. [We are] based on biblical principles, asking God and pleading with God to give us wisdom on decisions we make about people and the programs and partnerships we have. And He has blessed us.”

(Jesus was never quoted in the Gospels as calling LGBT sinners, or defining how people should behave in the privacy of their bedrooms. Jesus overturned all the Old Testament rules–except the Ten Commandments, one could argue–allowing those who believe in him to wear blended fabrics, get tattoos and eat bacon. Paul, who came along after Jesus ascended to Heaven and never knew him, as those to whom Gospels are attributed did, is an interpreter and evangelical rather than a firsthand-ish reporter whose stories where compiled after the fact.)

Burt and Ernie’s pals are standing up for everyone, gay and straight, who is appalled by Chick-fil-A, and not just because of the utterly vile, sub-literate spelling of

filet.

While the word may sound like a sexualized pun rhyming with gay

fill-lay

spelling it

fil-A

is neither cute nor clever. Just stupid.

The company’s dumbing of America continues with their economic war on LGBT via the Chick-fil-A charitable arm WinShape (as if dining on Chick-fil-A  gives you a winning shape) donating close to $2million to anti-LGBT groups, beyond the marriage equality battles:

In 2009 alone, WinShape donated $1,733,699 to multiple anti-gay groups:

  • Marriage & Family Legacy Fund: $994,199
  • Fellowship Of Christian Athletes: $480,000
  • National Christian Foundation: $240,000
  • Focus On The Family: $12,500
  • Eagle Forum: $5,000
  • Exodus International: $1,000
  • Family Research Council: $1,000

[Winshape 2009 Publicly Available IRS 990 Form via Foundation Center, accessed 10/28/11]

Mike Huckabee–who has been beating his breast about the abuse  Chick-fil-A has suffered at the hands of the media and the Muppets while ignoring the loathing and lack of equality funded by the food chain–has declared August 1st “Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day” and via Facebook his media onslaught is encouraging people to eat the cholesterol-dense, high-sodium, sugared, MSG-laden fast food. Because he loves America.

There’s also a push to make August 3 National Same-Sex Kiss-In Day at Chick-fil-A, which has some pros and cons. First of all, same sex couples would have to go inside a Chick-fil-A. And all us straight people can do is either find a willing co-kisser, enter a Chick-fil-A to applaud the kiss-in, or keep boycotting some place where we’d never eat anyway.

And if you’ve been wondering what you might be missing by never sampling a gay-hating, heart and soul destroying fast food sammich, here are two chemical-free versions you can try at home,  very gay friendly. But still fried after being battered with  sugar and salt. Part of me thinks natural ice cream might be healthier.

15 Responses to "Tripp Palin Would Make Perfect Chick-fil-A Spokesperson. And There’s a Same-Sex Kiss-In. Oh Heck, Make a Chicken Fritter Sammie at Home"
tammanytiger | Tuesday July 24, 2012 06:17 pm 1

Don’t forget. John McCain told us that Tripp’s grandma was a better candidate than Willard Romney.


nonpartisanliberal | Tuesday July 24, 2012 06:21 pm 2

On a side note, Biblical scholars say the four gospels were written 40-70 years after Jesus’ death (not all at the same time). It is unlikely that the authors knew him. Also, even though there was a “Jesus movement” before the gospels were written, nothing written about Jesus during his lifetime or in the first four decades after his death mentioned the miracles attributed to Jesus in the gospels (and the gospel accounts are not consistent).


nonpartisanliberal | Tuesday July 24, 2012 06:25 pm 3

The word faggot refers to a bundle of kindling wood. I suppose it became a pejorative for a homosexual man either because he was “flaming,” or because both faggot and flaming referred to a desire by the intolerant to set them on fire.


Lisa Derrick | Tuesday July 24, 2012 06:54 pm 4
In response to nonpartisanliberal @ 2

Yes. Which is why I wrote this: Paul, who came along after Jesus ascended to Heaven and never knew him, as those to whom Gospels are attributed did, is an interpreter and evangelical rather than a firsthand-ish reporter whose stories where compiled after the fact.

There is also healthy debate about “Q” which appears to be a source for some of the material. Hwever, it’s safe to say even with 40-70 years of iterations, if Jesus had said “And knowing or marrying one who is of the same, male to male, female to female, is anathema,” that would have carried down. In Feb of this year it was announced:

Dallas Theological Seminary professor Daniel B. Wallace has said that newly discovered fragments from the Gospel of Mark could be the oldest New Testament artifacts ever found and date from the first century A.D., or during the time of eyewitnesses of Jesus’ resurrection.


Starbuck | Tuesday July 24, 2012 07:13 pm 5

Actually, Lisa, Jesus dumbed it down to two Commandments. Love thy God and love thy neighbor.

The second is the most interesting…Love thy neighbor as thyself. Hmmm, most people don’t love themselves..


john in sacramento | Tuesday July 24, 2012 07:57 pm 6

Seems as though things like that run in the family. Check out the middle finger on the little princess

http://www.dependablerenegade.com/photos/dr_pix/2czc1ua.jpg


john in sacramento | Tuesday July 24, 2012 08:01 pm 7

There is also healthy debate about “Q” which appears to be a source for some of the material.

Wait. What? This guy?


ottogrendel | Tuesday July 24, 2012 09:12 pm 8
In response to Starbuck @ 5

Yes, this second commandment doesn’t seem to take into account masochists.


ottogrendel | Tuesday July 24, 2012 09:21 pm 9

“CEO Dan Cathy said: “But as an organization we can operate on biblical principles.”"

So Chick-Fil-A feeds the hungry for free? And thereafter refuses to judge others or cast stones?

More importantly, the CEO, at least, asks God for advice on business decisions?! Do stock holders know this? That’s a sound business model. To be fair, the CEO for Popeyes Chicken is rumored to consult a ten-foot diameter Magic 8 Ball (how he shakes it I have no idea).


ottogrendel | Tuesday July 24, 2012 09:56 pm 10

“Jesus overturned all the Old Testament rules”

Jesus begs to differ: ““Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them.” Matt 5:17 NIV

But your point is sound. Jesus never says a thing about homosexuality. Indeed, how anyone can read the Gospels and come away with any other idea than that Jesus and the Disciples were gay is beyond me. These four books are packed with homoerotic references. One example among many from John 13:

“When Jesus had thus said, he was troubled in spirit, and testified, and said, Verily, verily, I say unto you, that one of you shall betray me. Then the disciples looked one on another, doubting of whom he spake. Now there was leaning on Jesus’ bosom one of his disciples, whom Jesus loved. Simon Peter therefore beckoned to him, that he should ask who it should be of whom he spake. He then lying on Jesus’ breast saith unto him, Lord, who is it?”

Re Wallace: Relying on the research of someone for whom an historical Jesus is absolutely essential to maintaining their faith (in fact, the religion would not exist without this assertion) sounds about like asking the American Enterprise Institute for objective advice on attacking Iran. Wallace may be correct, but why take at face value the word of someone with such an intense conflict of interest? Outside of Christian “research,” there seems to be less evidence for an historical Jesus than there is for St. Nick.


cwaltz | Tuesday July 24, 2012 11:31 pm 11

We’re down to criticizing people because their toddler was unruly?

Sure am glad you all weren’t around to judge me when my three year old frustrated by having to put on his own sandals was caught muttering “f**king sandals” or when another one of my children who at 3 mortified me by asking me “why is that lady so fat(and to think today he is a kind and thoughtful 15 year old that people tell me is so nice)?”

I’d hate to think what that would mean to my parenting creds.

Chickfila should be criticized for their stance on gay marriage but I’m not at all sure what THAT has to do with the big newsflash revelation that toddlers often don’t possess great language skills and often behave poorly (often as a result of their inability to exprss themselves eloquently.) I have yet to see a toddler that has never had a meltdown. It’s part of the age.

This post makes you appear to be almost as big of a bully as Chick Fil A.


jadez | Wednesday July 25, 2012 04:47 am 12

anyone who even knows who trip palin is hardly qualifies to be making any legitimate suggestions, even if they fall under the broken clock rule.

geez.


jadez | Wednesday July 25, 2012 04:56 am 13
In response to cwaltz @ 11

ahh,,this story is not a personal attack against you or your son.

i am sure you were a great parent and have the belt to prove it.

though i am not sure what “THAT” has to do with your attitude.

(but i would hate to be under your control and have to find out)

anger issues?


cwaltz | Wednesday July 25, 2012 12:06 pm 14
In response to jadez @ 13

It’s sonS plural and a daughter thankyouverymuch. Oh and I don’t need to be personally attacked to have the right to be offended that a 3 year old’s behavior is being utilized to make political hay.

It’s great that in your spare time you play psychiatrist on the internet. I wouldn’t quit your day job though.

Oh and yes adult MORONS do make me angry(as opposed to young impressionable 3 year olds that don’t know any better and get taught over time). It’s one of the reasons that this country is in decline.


Lisa Derrick | Thursday July 26, 2012 02:45 pm 15
In response to nonpartisanliberal @ 3

Read Kipling’s “Stalky & Co” –that word appears frequently, used by upper classmen to refer to underclassmen, possibly because one of the jobs of the underclassmen was to gather kindling for the big boys. At age 13 I was a little shocked to see it used over and over again. By the author of The Jungle Book.


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