Late Night: Waltzing in Hell. Or Tennessee.

I have family in Tennessee. Tennessee is home to lots that is good about America: barbecue, blues, jazz, Elvis, the St. Jude Memorial Research Center/Children’s Hospital, not to mention some gorgeous scenery and important history. But gods have mercy on us, they are crazy there. And it is just getting worse.

The State Senate passed a bill which banned the word “gay” in schools. HB600–a bill which prohibits local municipalities and counties, including local school districts, from enacting local laws or school policies that protect LGBT against discrimination–has passed. There’s another bill pending,  pointed out by Blue Texan, which says

that teachers must be helped “to find effective ways to present the science curriculum as it addresses scientific controversies.” It also says that teachers may not be prohibited from “helping students understand, analyze, critique and review in an objective manner the scientific strengths and scientific weaknesses of existing scientific theories covered in the course being taught.”

Controversies, like how The World As We Know It was formed when the Holy Unicorn pooped glitter? Or the debate about which came first Chicken Who Laid The Egg That Became The World, or The Egg Whence Hatched Chicken?

Intelligent design, creationism or Holy Unicorn poop, hopefully students won’t experience the effects of evolution firsthand via nuclear mutations, since their state (the only one that permits the commercial burning of nuclear waste) has accepted the “offer” of 1,000 tons of radioactive leftovers from Germany, after the Czech Republic passed on the nifty glow-in-the-dark goo, according to the ironically named Donald Safer, chairman of the Tennessee Environmental Council. Yes, they burn nuclear waste in Tennessee.

Uh, Tennessee has tornadoes. And floods. And prevailing winds.  Hot damn, welcome to hell.

Eat His Words? Lunch with Julian Assange Up for Auction


The donate-and-have-a-chance-at-Bill Clinton fundraiser to pay off Hillary Clinton’s 2008 presidential campaign debt has drawn to a close, winner to be announced eventually. Ah, but there’s another opportunity to spend time with a possibly far more dangerous man: Julian Assange.

Yes, a three hour lunch with cyber star Assange, plus renowned Slovenian philosopher, Slavoj Žižek, and seven other high bidders is up on eBay. While the lunch at

one of London’s finest restaurants

and front row tickets to a talk by the two hosts, plus cab fare to the location later in the day is covered in the bid, you’re on your own for airfare to make it to the July 2nd nosh. Current bids for seats 6 and 7 are $3,031.97 and $1,753.62, respectively, with 100% of the proceeds going to WikiLeaks. The auction closes June 20th.

And acquaintance who knows Assange says

He’s really funny and cool when he isn’t wound up about all this stuff

so maybe prepare some non-WikiLeaks related talking points for witty repartee.

But I want to know what’s to stop some dastardly villain from bidding an outrageous amount and then offing everyone during the cheese course? I know, I read too many spy novels, but really, will simply providing ID upon winning the bid  be enough to protect Assange?

FDL Late Night: I Join AARP. Maybe.

As of tonight, at 8:35 pm west coast time, I turn AARP-eligible, so I am technically 50. Right now I am sitting in the Cactus Lounge of Standard Hotel in West Hollywood. There’s a poetry reading going on curated by a friend, other friends are here. I am mulling what it’s like to be 50, if it means anything or is just an arbitrary marker.

I keep coming back to all the vast changes in the world and in my life. The Jetsons future is here, we are living in it. Video phones! I keep coming back to video phones. My fifth grade science teacher Mr. Cagle said that it could be difficult technology in order to synch image and picture. And now we have them! I would like a shoe phone, though.

My dad was a test astronaut, my mom worked in the military defense industry; before that they both worked for a division of RAND where, when I was born, a pink computer punch card was sent to every employee announcing my birth. If I had been a boy, it would have been blue. (Weirdly my ex-husband’s father worked with my parents, as did the mother of one of my now best friends). Punch cards? I think Facebook has replaced those!

These past five decades have been really exciting, thrilling, overwhelming, full of noise and laughter and music, world tragedies and huge advances, personal sorrows and joys. Close friends have died, married, divorced, remarried, had babies, been denied the right to marry, lost their homes. I have loved well, but at times not wisely. I have some nice tattoos and, thanks to sun block, very smooth skin. My health insurance is more per month than all my other bills (except mortgage) combined. I am very blessed to be able to pay it each month. I am very blessed, period. I am grateful I get to write for FDL, that people read me, and that WiFi exists so I can be in two places at once.

What did 50 feel like to you, was it significant when it hit? Did it matter except on actuarial tables? Are you anticipating half a century? What miracles and monsters have you seen?

And when are we gonna get lithium crystal powered warp accelerators and transporter beams?

Coldplay, Maroon 5, Yoko Ono Raise Funds for Joplin Tornado Victims

The tornado that struck Joplin, Missouri on May 22 was the deadliest in American history, with (as of yesterday) 153 killed and millions of dollars in damage.  Spurred by the efforts of Joplin-born music manager Tyler Childs to raise funds for the United Way of Southwest Missouri and Southeast Kansas and help rebuild his hometown, artists, sports figures, and celebrities like Coldplay, Maroon 5, Yoko Ono, Tim McGraw and Dave Matthews are providing once in a lifetime experiences and unique signed items in an eBay auction powered by Giving Engine.

Here are just a few of the amazing experiences and items offered:

  • An all-expenses-paid trip to Lollapalooza donated by Coldplay and a meet and greet with the band
  • Meet and greet with Maroon 5 and four tickets to any show (except NY or LA) on their US tour
  • 2 Tickets to the season finale taping of NBC’s The Voice
  • 64GB iPad 2 with 3G personally donated by Yoko Ono with a signed postcard
  • A visit to the set of NBC’s hit show The Office
  • 2 VIP tickets to the set of Fox NFL Sunday for an afternoon of football with Terry Bradshaw, Michael Strahan, Jimmy Johnson, Howie Long and the gang

The auction ends on June 20th.

Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher Tweet Sorta-Support of Palin

Ashton Kutcher  who made his some of  fortune playing dumb guys but is actually pretty darn smart–he’s a former biomedical engineering student and a current investor in Silicon Valley–took to his early-adopted Twitter–to voice his opinion about the release of Palin’s email:

Wife Demi Moore retweeted her support as well:

Well at least it’s a distraction from Weiner. But there might be something important in those emails. Joe McGinniss thinks there are all sorts of clues to all sorts of things. And reminds us that 2,500 pieces have been redacted.


Weiner in Der Schnitzle


I am not a strict moralist. To a lot of guys internet interactions are disconnected from reality, like looking at Playboy but interactive, like going to a strip club without leaving the house.  Oh and free! Women may view such communications differently. The femme on the other end of the sexting could possibly think

It means something,

that it is form of intimacy that carries a certain weight. Honeys, I have a clue for you, it means a lot less to them than fornication, and well, gods bless guys’ reptile brains–can I eat it? can I fuck it? will it kill me?–a lot of times, fornication doesn’t mean much to them either except during the act. Afterwards could be a yikes-ooops or oh wow I’ve seen heaven, where’s the marriage bureau moment. Or something in between. (And the “Will it kill me?” question has a subtext of “If I get caught.”)

Some women don’t care if the guy holding his joystick is single, married, engaged, or whatever, they are enjoying themselves, the drama, the intrigue, the sexiness. But it is an exchange, and that carries some emotional currency.

Women like reading porn; men like seeing it, so the old saw goes; and there are only so many ways to skin a cat or grease a pole, which is why so many online/stexting exchanges look and read, well just like everyone else’s. Or a bad draft of a Penthouse Forum letter. But Weiner’s free wheeling-dealer had a moment of real emotion–and gullibility coupled with gentle teasing–before she dropped the dox on the digital diddler.

May 31st 2011
omg! are u okay? so sorry u got hacked…i know u would never do anything like have fb sex or take pics of your c***…who is the b***** who ratted u out? I am the only fb chick u can trust
June 1st 2011
u owe me big time for keeping this all quiet…i am defending u to the death on every blog and to everyone….telling everyone u would never send dirty messages to women
i know u haven’t been on here since u were hacked but i NEED to talk to u…someone contacted me about u…call me or something.

And rat him out she did. reports that the day before Lisa Weiss approached them and their sister outlet The Star, the liberal blackjack dealer sent a Tweet to the Rachel Maddow show. On June 3.

@maddow have a juicy political story i wnt to give u!how do i contact ur show?

Hell hath no fury…

Men, keep in mind that even if you are not famous, a politician, or a famous politician, your Apple-wielding temptress, the passionate python petter behind the PC will tell someone, or several, about her FB fling with Tony the dentist.  And really shouldn’t have Weiner created an alter-ego? But then he couldn’t have used his Facebook account and Twitter as a feeding ground. And it’s kinda sad that he needed that reinforcement. And needed that risk.

Weiss says she didn’t know Weiner was married. Oh come on, she never thought to Google her cyber-stud? Um, fail.

For a woman in a committed real-life, beast with two backs relationship, finding out that her  sig-o has been stoking his stroking online can be a huge bummer, raising questions about fidelity, intimacy, sexuality, sharing, commitment and so on.  Those are issues that each couple needs to decide; it’s a case-by-case basis. A good rule of thumb: If you don’t want your current partner to know know what you are doing online, it’s time to re-examine things. Everything.





Tony Weiner Doll!

Oh dear, I hear the pick up lines now:

Hey wanna play with my weiner, doll?

My other weiner’s an action figure, too!

Brought to you by Herobuilders, the same toy company that brought us the Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann dollies, this nifty toy comes in two versions, one resembling the grey boxer brief tweet-heard-round the world, while the other sports the fully exposed, uh weiner that Andrew Brietbart exposed to Opie and Anthony’s in studio cameras after telling Fox News Red Eye he wouldn’t put out the photos unless Weiner’s camp attempted to smear the women involved:

I have every right to release this photo if I want to. It is in my possession. I don’t want to add further damage to his family. I think the point has been made.  But I have said – I have seen team Clinton operates. I saw how they treated the women during the Clinton thing. They went after Monica Lewinski. There will be an investigation into this guy, and he doesn’t want any more than the six that he has announced to come out. So, somebody has on to send a message. If he sends a message to these girls by showing some of the photographs they have given. If he starts playing hardball, Clinton-style Lewinski hard ball like he did with Paula Jones and calling her trailer trash and all of that crap – yeah, I have fingers that go like that.


Dual Palin Docs: Doppleganger Views of Sarah to Hit Screens

Movies-goers and politics junkies will have their eyes-a-poppin’ when The Undefeated hits theaters July 15th. Directed by Tea Party activist Stephen Bannon, the documentary features numerous Palin supporters giving rah-rahs about the former Alaska governor, which makes sense: Real Politics reports that while the defeated VP candidate

did not have any editorial role in the project, Palin facilitated access for Bannon and his film crew to key Alaskan defenders who were involved with the major achievements of her administration, and the filmmaker spent several weeks in the 49th state gathering archival film and conducting research and interviews for the project.

As of now, The Undefeated is scheduled to be released in markets such as Dallas, Denver, Oklahoma City, Orlando, Atlanta, Orange County, Phoenix, Houston, Indianapolis, and Kansas City; premiering in the state of Iowa as a warm up for the caucus. The film, according to CBS News political correspondent Jan Crawford, who has seen the full documentary is

an unabashed defense of the former Alaska governor that leaves the distinct impression her presidential candidacy not only is possible, but inevitable.

Meanwhile, guerrilla filmmaker Nick Broomfield has a Palin pic in the can. In the past he’s skewered Courtney Love in Kurt & Courtney, raised more than a few questions in Biggie & Tupac, and profiled Margaret Thatcher, dominatrixes, and serial killer Aileen Wuornos. According to a source close to Broomfield, who spoke to the Los Angeles Times anonymously due to the sensitive nature of the film, the yet-to-be-titled documentary features:

Palin’s parents as well as numerous ex-aides. Many of those people, the source added, describe her not as the likable repository of aw-shucks wisdom Palin likes to present but a more ruthless politician who has trampled over opponents and is now a potential presidential candidate.

The Times hypothesizes that Broomfield’s film will play festivals before getting distribution in the 2012 election cycle in which Palin will be a key player.

(photo: screen shot from Katie Couric interview with Palin)

Jennifer Garner, Ben Affleck Support Alec Baldwin Run for NYC Mayor


Alec Baldwin’s so-far theoretical run for mayor–which is based on a a “pal” talking to the Daily (something that may or may not have been okayed by Baldwin, since “friends” leaking stuff can be a classic tabloid move engineered by the subject)–has gotten its first celeb power couple endorsement, weirdly via Fox & Friends.

Jennifer Garner guested on FNC three stooges’ morning show Thursday to discuss Save the Children’s early education initiative, and when asked about her fellow thespian’s mayoral dreams said:

I think he would give us all a run for his money. He’s awesome, I love Alec. I think he should go for it. He could run and let people vote!

Garner,told F&F that she supports Baldwin’s run. as does Affleck:

Yes, I stand up for Alec Baldwin!…

When asked if Affleck would support Baldwin,the actress at first politely declined to speak for her husband, then laughed:

Oh have no idea what Ben would say, he would… Yes, Ben stands up for Alec Baldwin too!

adding that she didn’t see her spouse running for office anything soon.

Ooooh, let’s hope Alec Baldwin does run, if only for the who’s wearing what/fashion do’s and don’ts at the various fundraisers (and hopefully the inaugural ball)!

Brave Moo World: Cows Produce Human Breast Milk!

Udderly creepy! Scientists in China have created a herd of 300 cows that produce human breast milk, according to Sky News, and the hu-moo juice should be available on Chinese supermarket shelves in three years.  Using transgenic and cloning technology similar to that which produced Dolly the sheep, cloned cow embryos were injected with human genes and then implanted into surrogate cows.

Workers at University of Beijing’s dairy farm say the result–identical to human breast milk with the same antibacterial and immune-boosting qualities:

is sweeter and stronger than the usual bovine variety

Genetically modified food is popular in China where GM papayas, tomatoes, potatoes, and cooking oil are already widely available for sale. The team at University of Beijing have already produced animals that are resistant to mad cow disease, as well as beef cattle that are genetically modified to produce more nutritious meat.  The Chinese government recently approved insect-resistant rice and corn modified to help pigs absorb more nutrients.

Is there a breeding program to cross boy hu-moos to girl hu-moos? Do their heifer offspring also produce hu-milk? Or are boy hu-moos killed? What happens to their meat? And I have to wonder if human genes injected into the cloned milk cow embryos were screened for predispositions to genetic illnesses.

Lead cow developer and director of the research project, Professor Li Ning, says:

There are 1.5 billion people in the world who don’t get enough to eat. It’s our duty to develop science and technology, not to hold it back. We need to feed people first, before we consider ideals and convictions.

Hu-moo dairy worker  Jiang Yao said of the cow-man milk:

It’s good. It’s better for you because it’s genetically modified.


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